There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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