There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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