the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
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why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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