I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
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