She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize