I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Let's get the cat blown out
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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