Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize