ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
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