his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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