oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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