epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize