Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(660): View more from Missouri

He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"

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(734): View more from Michigan

Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(808): View more from Hawaii

some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday

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(225): View more from Louisiana

You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.

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(602): View more from Arizona

By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm

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(773): View more from Illinois

My dad just said "fuck circus"

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(301): View more from Maryland

This whole brainwashing thing is easy!

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