Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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