I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
We have so much sex to catch up on
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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