The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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