That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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