FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize