I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize