I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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