five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
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yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
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It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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