All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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