I'm lost and stupid without you.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize