She's JV to your varsity
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize