If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Randomize