Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(310): View more from California

dude i need help, im throwing up blood.

(323): View more from California

no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.

(310): View more from California

oh, so thats why my junks red.

(323): View more from California

wow. cant help you there...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(310): dude i need help, im throwing up blood. (323): no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up. (310): oh, so thats why my junks red. (323): wow. cant help you there... http://tfl.nu/yeir

Replies (15) Good night (674) Bad night (1479)
Favorite
(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(508): I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night http://tfl.nu/lkz0

Replies (2) Good night (2522) Bad night (891) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(724): View more from Pennsylvania

soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(724): soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices. http://tfl.nu/oyfa

Replies (10) Good night (675) Bad night (5497) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(303): View more from Colorado

I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(303): I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up http://tfl.nu/mvtn

Replies (15) Good night (815) Bad night (8071) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night. http://tfl.nu/vsnq

Replies (17) Good night (754) Bad night (3337) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(856): View more from New Jersey

Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(856): Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing. http://tfl.nu/px2y

Replies (15) Good night (4065) Bad night (887) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(773): View more from Illinois

apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(773): apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened. http://tfl.nu/hpbr

Replies (18) Good night (5706) Bad night (1445)
Favorite
(609): View more from New Jersey

He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(609): He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this. http://tfl.nu/kn9g

Replies (23) Good night (991) Bad night (4072) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(778): View more from British Columbia

Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(778): Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail? http://tfl.nu/fzou

Replies (20) Good night (4760) Bad night (729) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(732): View more from New Jersey

I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(732): I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time. http://tfl.nu/5sl5

Replies (7) Good night (5172) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(636): View more from Missouri

I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(636): I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk. http://tfl.nu/1zna

Replies (4) Good night (1200) Bad night (2402) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(712): View more from Iowa

They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(712): They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem. http://tfl.nu/r408

Replies (6) Good night (2298) Bad night (843) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(516): View more from New York

my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(516): my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly http://tfl.nu/e7hc

Replies (6) Good night (1603) Bad night (1176) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(774): View more from Massachusetts

Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(774): Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap http://tfl.nu/vchr

Replies (3) Good night (1124) Bad night (300)
Favorite
(920): View more from Wisconsin

You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(920): You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands. http://tfl.nu/ucsy

Replies (9) Good night (246) Bad night (892) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: