Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
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his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
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So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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