Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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