she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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