I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I could fuck to npr.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize