okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize