butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize