Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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