That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
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