no you cant smoke seaweed
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize