We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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