I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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