Please, let me fuck your mom
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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