This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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