when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize