Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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