3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize