Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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