Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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