He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize