we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize