Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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