im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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