The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
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So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
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My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
where are my eyebrows?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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