I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one acquire holy water?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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