Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just had sex on a roof
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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